You usually never know what life’s unforgettable moments are until the moment has gone, the people are gone and the summer is back. Split second you turned right instead of left and encountered a road you had passed by a million times before. Until now you lived with no regrets without fear or doubt or hesitation. Knowing somehow these are the very moments you will someday look back on and realize that it was then that your life changed. I have reached to a very numb stage today. Uncertain, lonely, sad: a year has passed by. I remember wandering the rooms of my apartment where the silence was almost palpable. There were even moments that I doubted if I made the right choices. Just like Liz Gilbert puts it in Eat Pray Love – The only thing more unthinkable than leaving was staying; the only thing more impossible than staying was leaving.
Battle-scarred and scared-unsure about the future, there was no other option but an Exit. Leaving the comfortable shell is one of the scariest things a person can do, and trust me on this one: it is far, far better to live a life of uncertain happiness than of certain misery.
Summer 2010 will undoubtedly go down in history as the summer of transition. Stretching, pulling, testing, challenging; doubts, fears, laughter, tears; tearing apart and putting back together. And though the ride has been sometimes been bumpy and sometimes been scary, the memories I have made along the journey have been priceless. And even if, like me, if your Road takes you right back where you started from, remember this: the struggles and the heartbreak and the lessons along the way have made you who you are today. These moments will one day become hallmarks in which I will measure other great moments against. And though I wish that I could hit the pause button NOW and soak in the magic of my CURRENT present spot forever, soon and often without even knowing and realizing it, time will turn the page and a new chapter will begin. But today, I am NUMB not willing to read it.
Life is short but this time it was bigger.
– Brad Paisley Feat. Alison Krauss (Whiskey Lullaby)